What is Overthinking?
Overthinking refers to the process of continuously analysing, dwelling on, or mulling over thoughts, decisions, or situations. It often involves excessive worry or contemplation that can lead to feelings of anxiety and stress. Instead of taking action, individuals may find themselves stuck in a loop of negative thinking, making it difficult to move forward or find a resolution.
Whether lying awake in bed at night, going over various scenarios, or being paralyzed by indecision at work, overthinking can become a significant problem. Not everyone who overthinks is anxious, but overthinking and anxiety often set up a vicious cycle where anxiety causes overthinking, which in turn exacerbates anxiety, leading to even more overthinking.
Examples of Overthinking:
- Worrying that you said something foolish and replaying the situation repeatedly. This is really common with social anxiety
- Before making a decision, imagining every possible outcome, especially the negative ones.
- Worrying about your health a lot and spending a lot of time looking up symptoms online in health anxiety
- Regretting and second-guessing past decisions, thinking, “If only I had chosen the other option, things would be better” (despite not knowing this for certain).
Overthinking goes beyond normal, healthy contemplation and leads to unhealthy levels of anxiety and stress. It is an attempt to keep you safe, but by making you feel unable to take action, it can do the opposite by causing you to stay in a bad situation or avoid taking necessary action.
Why do we Overthink?
There is no simple explanantion but in my experience our brain’s survival mechanism and lack of confidence play a huge role.
Biology
Our brain has a significant biological drive to stay alive, prioritizing survival over happiness and relaxation. I often explain this as “Your brain’s job is not to make you feel happy – it’s to keep you alive”. The amygdala, a part of the brain responsible for monitoring threats, can be more active in some people due to trauma or genetics. While it’s essential to have awareness of threats or danger if your amygdala is overactive you can be in a constant state of red alert looking out for the next danger where there is none.
Low Self-Esteem
People with low self-esteem are more likely to doubt their abilities and skills, leading to less confidence in handling situations. The less confident you feel that you will be able to cope if things don’t go according to plan, the more likely you are to get stuck in an overthinking loop.
How to know if Overthinking is getting out of control
While everyone thinks a lot sometimes, especially regarding significant decisions like moving house or changing jobs, there are signs that overthinking might be a problem:
- Sleeplessness: Not being able to sleep at night due to worrying about a situation.
- Difficulty Making Decisions: Even “small” decisions feel overwhelming.
- Overconcerned with Others’ Opinions: Excessive worry about what others think of you.
- Regretting Past Decisions: Spending a lot of time overthinking past mistakes, which worsens low self-esteem and anxiety.
If you recognize yourself in these descriptions, don’t panic. Overthinking is common, and you are not alone. As a past overthinker, I understand how it feels, and I have helped many people regain control over it.
Self-help for Overthinking
1. RAIN Meditation: RAIN meditation is a form of mindfulness that can help ground you in the present moment and break the cycle of overthinking. [Here’s a link to a guided RAIN meditation to try out!]
2. Timed Worry Sessions: By setting a timer for 5 minutes and jotting down your worries, you’re giving yourself permission to worry within a set time. This technique has proven to be effective in breaking the cycle of overthinking, so trust in its process.
3. Dance: Close the curtains, play music, and dance. This is another form of mindfulness that brings you into the present moment. Exercise and enjoyment can boost neurotransmitters in the brain that make you feel good.
4. Grounding Techniques: When you notice overthinking becoming overwhelming, say to yourself, “I am safe.” Feel your feet firmly on the ground and hug yourself—anything to soothe and calm you in the present moment.
Remember, everyone is different and what works for others might not work for you. The key is to experiment and find what techniques work best for you.
Conclusion
Overthinking can trap you in a cycle of anxiety and indecision, but you can break free. By practicing mindfulness, setting boundaries for worry, getting exercise (especially out in nature), and using grounding techniques, you can regain control and reduce the impact of overthinking on your life.
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